Damsel in Distress

That's it, I'm done with the whole Halloween costume thing! I was innocently enough, looking for a Princess Peach outfit to go along with my son Evan's Mario get up when I'm pretty sure I was sexually harassed. All I had to do was use my better judgement and just walk away from the way too short, cheap, pink dress but my little Miss. Sunshine optimism dulled my senses again. I figured it could possibly, maybe look different once I tried it on so, off I naively walked to the dressing room, hopeful that I would finally be done looking for this chick's dress.

Of course I hadn't really paid much attention to this makeshift changing station in the middle of the store before, because if I had, I wouldn't have handed my bargain find over to Mr. Scary Biker man in charge of the operation. There he was, a bald man dressed all in black with two sleeves of tattoos ready to take the contents of my bag out for me, direct me to a room, and repackage the costume all for the sake of convenience. On the surface it seemed like a helpful little service but, sometimes, appearances can be deceiving. "Oh, let's see here sweetie, pret-teh in pink" he said with a sly smile, holding the dress up and scanning it up and down as if it were a negligee. "You'll look cute in this. I like this material, it feels nice. Do you need any thigh highs?" Oh my FRIGGIN God!!!! Do I look like a skank to you in my Charlie Brown Great Pumpkin t-shirt, creep!

I was so caught off guard that I didn't even know how to respond. I just needed this costume to work so I could match my son and make a funny memory for him! Reluctantly, I continued on into the small, dark cubby with only a curtain for a door and no mirror except for the one on the other side to the room. Great, now I had to worry that a certain perv was going to see me. I resolved to just quickly pull the costume on over my clothes and be done with it all one way or another but the bodice was slightly snug and my arms couldn't quite reach the Velcro fastener in the back. Still fuming from the recent comments, I hastily went to raise my shirt over my head when sleazebag suddenly opened the curtain!!! "Oh, sorry, didn't know you were in there, my bad."

My bad, my ass! I was the only person there and the curtain was closed for a reason jackass. I'm so glad you got sneak peek. How many other women do you accidentally walk in on? When will they stop making women's Halloween costumes so racy? Not to mention what passes as acceptable for tweens. Maybe, if i search long enough, I could find an angel costume made of more than half a yard of fabric and dye it pink.